Tuesday, May 11, 2010
I'm angry, mad, frustrated and slightly depressed.
Jared and I went shopping yesterday for bikes for the kids. We found lots of great stuff and the kids seemed really excited to be shopping.
My issue is insecurity. I may have been naive in the past but I felt safe. Jared has meetings late into the evenings several times a month and I don't feel safe at home with the kids.
It's one thing to steal from my front yard. That's creepy. But they stole from under our awning, under an open window to my living room and they entered my property.
At first I was shocked and upset for the kids but now I'm angry. Whoever it was not only took my kids bikes;
-They took a piece of their innocence. The kids are concerned that things they love will be stolen, a concern they never had before.
-They took my security. As women we cling to security. We want to know we're safe, cared for, provided for. I really don't appreciate having an insecurity where once I felt secure.
-They took my time. I am searching craigslist and the internet for the best deals so that we can hopefully replace all the bikes. We went to two stores yesterday on Jared's day off and today Jared's heading to Leavenworth to check out a deal on a used bike. We have a call in to a guy in Lees Summit on a bike for Brennan.
-They took my money. Each of the items stolen were gifts from family. Now Jared and I are going to have to do our best to replace each item that was given to us originally.
I have thought several times, "ohh come on, it's really not that big of a deal. Probably some stupid prank." But then I remember what the officer said,"Make sure you lock up the garage because now they know what's in there. It's not uncommon for them to come back. Especially if they think you may have replaced the bikes."
Today I attacked my house. Cleaned from top to bottom. Shampooed carpets, cleaned windows, mopped floors. Apparently when I feel I can't control one thing I take full control over something else.
Ultimately the kids, Jared, and I are in God's hands and He is our protector and healer. This blog serves several purposes and one of those is venting. Thanks for indulging me.