Friday, January 1, 2010

Who Am I Really?

I've been thinking about reworking my blog since my template is a basic beige and few of you out there have the same one.

Last night I was talking with my friend Alisa over at the Sweet Life. I mentioned that she has a multitude of followers and said something like' "you have like 56 followers!" To which she smiled and said, "No it's 60."

I have to say to you 60, Good work! I follow her too because she's amay-za-zing! Her blog is easy to read, full of information, and it's attractive. I love the template because it's personal and unique but if I copy it it's no longer personal and unique to her. She knows who she is and her blog speaks to her strengths.

What I'm trying to say is this, I've been thinking for some time about who am I really? The blog template is just a side bar to a bigger question I've been wresting with. I want to be the best me God created me to be. I've looked through a hundred blogs looking for inspiration and I found lots that I like but nothing that speaks directly to who I am.

The problem is I'm a chameleon and feel like everything I do is a remnant of something I've admired from someone else. I see things that people do and they have passion for and I think, "hey, I can do that!" And I can do it but do I want to? Do I have a passion for it?

I've spent time here and there thinking about who and what I want to be when my kids grow up and I have no idea. We started our family when I was 24 and I had Anneliese when I had just turned 32. I am quickly coming up on a time in my life where I will have the freedoms to do hobbies, more education or whatever. Even with homeschooling life will get less hectic as the kids grow and I'm going to be 40 without a direction.

My goal this year is to seek God's plan for my future. What is HE passionate about? What skills/talents/gifts has He given me that can be used for His kingdom?

I guess a better question than the title of this blog is, "Who am I in Christ?"


Amy said...

I'm not sure how God will answer these questions for you. But I am sure that I love who you are now and that I look forward to seeing who He is shaping you to be. Our friendship is precious to me. I love you.

Alisa said...

oh,I sure hope that didn't sound snotty. It certainly wasn't meant that way at all....just a little friendly competition ;)

I always look forwarding to reading your blog because you have a gift with articulating your thoughts that I so don't have. I can tell ya how to make a nifty craft, but thoughts...uh, nope.

God has given us all such diverse gifts(and you have quite a few that I can think of). I'll be praying for you to figure out how He wants you to use your gifts to his glory.

Love ya!

Shannon said...

Alisa, it wasn't snotty AT ALL, in fact I've been a little worried today after I wrote this that you would think I was offended or what you said was offensive or whatever and that wasn't the case at all. Like I said I just have been working through some things and the blog issue is just a symptom of a bigger issue. What am I defined by? I admire you and your 60 followers :) I love that you are a confident woman of God who knows her skills and talents. Besides I'm the one who brought it up! Thank you both for your sweet words of encouragement. I just always want to be in His will and use His gifts for His glory!