Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Post Break Down

Yesterday was a rough day. I started out the morning crying to my snoring husband. I guess it was the release after the shower. I have been feeling like I wasn't ready for our little girl and I knew after the shower we'd be stocked and ready to go.

Monday morning I had everything in place and felt the realness of it all sink in. I just had the "I'm over it" emotion wash over me.

Most of the day I cried off and on. I was having trouble walking and apparently Anneliese has descended further down (I didn't think that was possible) and my bathroom breaks are coming every 15-20 minutes. The pressure, awkwardness, and general pain and malaise had taken it's toll.

By 7:30 I was sitting on the couch with tears running down my face and I didn't even know why at that point. I looked over at Jared and said, "I don't feel well, I'm going to go lay down." I fell asleep and slept hard until 11ish. I woke up desperate for the bathroom. I sat with Jared for a little while and took my nightly meds and then headed back to bed not to stir (not counting bathroom breaks) until 9am.

Everything is better today. The sun is shining. I feel rested. I even took Maurey for a short walk today. My sweet Michelle came over for several hours and we just chatted. All of the windows are open and I've slowly been working on laundry.

The break down is over and I'm hoping not to have it return. We are starting week 36 on Friday and meeting our little girl is just around the corner.

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